anxiety!

Do you worry continually almost every day about both big and small problems, situations, events, and/or activities?

Do you have difficulty controlling your worries or anxieties?

Do you feel like you can't concentrate or that your mind goes blank at times?

Does your worrying interfere with your normal routines, work or school, and/or social activities?


If you answered "yes" to the above questions, you might have an anxiety disorder. I'm pretty sure that I have an anxiety disorder. And, I'm struggling with the idea of taking medication for it. I'm not sure why I feel so weird about it. I mean, if I have a headache, I take Advil. If I have a cold, I take TheraFlu. Why does taking anti-anxiety medication seem so different? Why does trying to curb excessive worry by taking a pill seem like a cop-out? Why does simply admitting that it's bad enough to warrant treatment make me feel like some sort of failure? Maybe that's all part of the disorder. Maybe getting rid of my general worry will also alleviate my concern for taking a drug to help with that worry. Maybe this will be a good thing. Maybe...

if i had a super power...

Flying, traveling at the speed of light, telekinesis, accelerated healing, invisibility, invulnerability, super strength, precognition... the list of potential superhuman powers goes on and on.

For a more comprehensive list of superhuman abilities:
Wikipedia: Superhuman Abilities in Fiction

Although many of these abilities sound pretty great, I think the fictional character whose power I am most envious of is Evie Garland from Out of this World. For those of you not familiar with this 80s sitcom, it's about an average teenage girl (Evie) who happens to be half-alien, half-human (see Out of This World (TV Series) to find out more). Evie's most appealing power is her ability to freeze time, which she does by touching her two index fingers together.

Now, I don't know about you, but I think having this power would be AWESOME. With this power, the can't-go-out-because-I-have-to-study/work/clean/read/etc. problem is solved in a touch of two fingers. My only real concern would be accelerated aging. I hope that frozen time wouldn't age you at the same rate that "normal" time does. Otherwise, I'm sure I would abuse the power and end up looking 60 by the time I turned 26.

Lately, I feel that I say some variant of the phrase "not enough time" several times a day. The time scarcity I have been faced with this semester has been an overwhelming source of stress, and has tended to dominate my thoughts. It's fun to fantasize about having the ability to create extra time so easily, but honestly, I really can't afford to spend any more time daydreaming about it. Oh, what I would give for that power... Oh well. Back to working at my snail speed!

To find out how you can develop super powers:
eHow: How to Get Super Powers

Also, I think Zack Morris had this time freezing ability as well, but only appeared to be able to use his ability for soliloquy purposes and not for anything particularly useful.

I'm pretty sure that "notworking" is also the main purpose of blog writing.

what kind of an imposter are YOU?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_Syndrome

http://xkcd.com/451/

cooking while drunk is almost never a good idea

A lot of people make bad decisions when drunk. Some sleep with inappropriate people, some do idiotic and reckless stunts, some become belligerent and get into fights... What do I do? I watch Disney movies and bake. Could be worse, right? WRONG! Sure, mixing up some cake batter and sticking it into the oven at 2 am *seems* benign enough. I mean, who doesn't want a freshly baked warm and delicious piece of cake to eat along with a fluffy movie after a night of drinking? I know I do. There are two key points that make this late night cake baking a bad idea: First, baking takes a relatively long time (30-35 minutes at least). Second, falling asleep on my couch takes a relatively short time. Independently, these are not huge issues. The combination, however, can be problematic. My thought process went something like this: "Oooo, cake sounds really yummy.... Hey, I have a box of cake mix. I should totally make cake!" After mixing up the batter, sticking it in the oven, and switching on a movie, I promptly fell asleep on my couch. I woke up a few hours later to the smell of burnt cake. I'm surprised (and maybe a little concerned) that my smoke detector did not go off. I tried eating the burnt cake, but it was not edible. So, I brushed my teeth and went to bed. I was pretty disappointed about the cake. Next time maybe I should try baking something that takes less time to cook. Cookies perhaps....

a little tipsy...

Interesting. I just got home and sent off the post I wrote earlier today. It's Friday night, I really should be studying for quals, and I'm a little drunk. As I often do when I get home from a bar, I popped in a ridiculously optimistic girly movie ("Enchanted" this time), and am watching it while I eat a shitload of carbs. I wonder if there is anything to the claim one of my friends makes that the Disney/chick flick optimism is detremental to children. Could believing in happy endings result in a twisted view of the world that can't ever possibly be lived up to? I hope not. But maybe if we all grew up thinking that the world is a shitty place and that things don't always work out, we would be pleasantly surprised if they did and not disappointed if they didn't. It's something to think about I guess.

let's see what happens...

Okay, so I haven't ever been able to successfully keep a blog/journal/diary/etc. at any point in my life. If history is a good predictor of the future, that does not bode well for this blog attempt. To be honest, this is my second try at this very blog. In October I wrote one entry and then promptly forgot about the blog's existence. Today I got the blog itch again, and, remembering that I had started one before, resurrected it, deleted the first entry, and am starting anew. We'll see how it goes...